Consider this story an addendum to my earlier review of Wakame.

The Lambert family birthday tradition is that whosoever's birthday it is picks the restaurant. And I picked Wakame, because I haven't managed to get back there since the first time, and it'd been far, far too long since I'd had the Annie's Ika squid appetizer.

Pasta in a cream sauce with cajun chicken.

Before I go into further details, let me mention that I went to Jake's City Grille in Eden Prairie with my parents for my dad's birthday, and they like it, and it's not what I would call bad food. As such.

But there's something about a place like Jake's, a place that's still serving cajun chicken pasta in 2010, that makes me want to scream. A place that puts their name on things (Jakesauce, Jakewings, Jakefries) when, at least in the case of the Jakefries, clearly came frozen off the back of a truck.

As I've mentioned in the past, when I go out to eat, more often than not it's at a fast-casual place with counter service. Sure, I see the value in going to a nice restaurant, sitting down, and enjoying a nice, long meal with good service and pleasant conversation. But I don't always have the time or money for that, and neither do you. And so I find myself at a Chipotle, or a Panera, or a Noodles, or, from time to time, a Pei Wei.

Everyone needs a First Wok in their lives.

There is, believe it or not, a bit of a downside to living in a major metropolitan area that is bursting to the seams with varied and authentic Asian cuisines. And that downside is the difficulty you run into when all you really want is some old-school takeout Chinese. 

So last weekend, I went to Pei Wei Asian Diner with my parents. If you don't know Pei Wei, it's a counter-service Asian restaurant run by the PF Chang people, and while I would never, ever set foot in a PF Chang, I'm fine with Pei Wei. I should do a post on it at some point, in fact.

Anyway, we're standing there, perusing the sideways flat screens displaying the menus, chock full of noodle dishes and pan-Asian stir-fries, when a manager-looking dude comes up to us and asks how many of us there are, and if we've been there before.

Until Saturday, I have been immune to the charms of the "take and bake" pizza concept. I mean, pizza is one of the few foods that can consistantly arrive on your doorstep, already cooked and ready to eat. "Take and bake" seems to defy all pizza logic, in that you have to go and get it, and then, once you've gotten it, you have to cook it.

I have made no secret of my love for the glorious taco. But it is not a boundless love. It has boundaries.

Case in point - I have been to Taqueria Los Ocampos, in the Midtown Global Market, at least a dozen times, and probably more. And I have never, ever, ever ordered a taco. Not even a gordita. And that is because they sell the huarachazo.

This is what Burger Kings are going to look like soon.

No, really.

The good news is, is should be fairly inexpensive for franchises, as they can pick up everything they need from a Target clearance aisle three years ago. The bad news is, once they make the mandatory upgrade, they're going to have to stare at this all fucking day long.

"I Could Eat This All Fucking Day" is an ongoing celebration of my favorite restaurant dishes, the things that I order despite every intention of ordering something different.

Barbecued Pork Fried Rice. Say it soft and it sounds like praying. Chinese barbecued pork is one of the greatest meat products or byproducts known to man. Even more so because I can't make it, and I can't even buy it that easily.